Pontiac Street Performance
Home | Profile | Register | Active Topics | Members | Search | FAQ
Username:
Password:
Save Password

 All Forums
 General Discussion
 THE NEUTRAL ZONE
 Void of manners
 New Topic  Reply to Topic
 Printer Friendly
Author Previous Topic Topic Next Topic  

Bill Boyle
Horse Feathers (Charter Member)

USA
4869 Posts

Posted - 10 Dec 2017 :  2:47:29 PM  Show Profile  Visit Bill Boyle's Homepage  Reply with Quote
What has happened that people nowadays disregard simple manners and courtesies?

Why is it that when you're seated in a restaurant and the server (formerly waitress or waiter) brings you food or beverage and you say "thank you," the response is typically "no problem" rather than, "you're welcome? " "No problem" must mean, "it wasn't anything," "it was nothing," it does not mean the polite, "you are welcome" which means" I'm happy to do it." It is a gracious comment whereas "no problem" is just a retort.

Oh yeah, and what about, the server that comes to the table and states" Hi my name is Brittany and I'm going to be your server, what can I get "you guys." The reference "you guys" may be fitting for a group of twenty year olds at a pizza joint, but not to people old enough to be their parents, grand parents, aunts or uncles, the local pastor, rabbi, etc.

When you say, "Would you please bring us some knives and forks" and the reply is, once again, "no problem" it obvious there was a problem because there were no utensils on the table. This is the wrong response. What about, "I'm sorry, l'll get them."

Crazy as it is, I hold to many of the old fashioned courtesies my parents taught me. For instance, I still hold the door open for others to enter before me. If seated in a doctor's office and an elderly person with a cane or a woman comes in and there are no seats left, I give up mine to them. If they are my age or older, they typically reply "thank you." However, many people my age and certainly many 30 years younger, fail to say anything for the courtesy extended to them.


"Dedicated to keeping the classic Pontiac engine alive."

----
400 bored +.030, forged TRW pistons, ported 62 heads, Hedman headers, 2.5 SS dual exhaust X Pypes, Comp 276AH10 cam, Scorpion 1.65 RR, 850 Q-jet, stock intake & tuned HEI; original owner.

rkellerjr
Many Feathers

USA
1275 Posts

Posted - 10 Dec 2017 :  3:13:04 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Yep, I've noticed all those things as well and it really burns me because it takes no effort to be kind and polite... none. It's why I love chick-fil-a a lot, nothing but manners there (at least our local restaurants).

Rich
1975 TA - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aR86YT69yeY
Go to Top of Page

NOTROD
Two Feathers

USA
71 Posts

Posted - 23 Dec 2017 :  11:58:10 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
In todays world we should probably just be glad if we don't get an eye roll or sigh when asking someone to do their job.
Go to Top of Page

loosetappet
Sitting Bull

116 Posts

Posted - 29 Dec 2017 :  3:56:15 PM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
If you remember what good service looks like, sounds like, or feels like, you, like me, are of a certain age. Good service, just like good manners, honesty, integrity, public service, and cheap classic cars, are quickly passing from life in these United States.
Go to Top of Page

GtoGuy32
Crazy Horse

USA
851 Posts

Posted - 02 Jan 2018 :  12:05:59 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I ate out a ton the last 6 months due to a home rennovation. I see exactly your points. Kids today stress easy and don?t know how to learn on their own. We?re turning the world over to a bunch of wimp, underachievers, who obviously have no manners.

The best service I have gotten is when I used to go to China weeks on end for work.

I feel like our hobby is in trouble too. Kids have no patience and don?t want to work for anything.
Go to Top of Page

Bill Boyle
Horse Feathers (Charter Member)

USA
4869 Posts

Posted - 02 Jan 2018 :  09:13:48 AM  Show Profile  Visit Bill Boyle's Homepage  Reply with Quote
Dave--the "please and thank you courtesies" and acting gentlemanly is eroding. I was starting to notice a peculiar phenomenon while on active duty working in the Pentagon.

It involved getting on a train at a train platform, early in the morning, during a typical Northern VA day.

I was in uniform along with about 30 other civilians and military awaiting the arrival of our train. There were military of all descriptions and a large contingency of AF and Naval officers.

The people waiting for the train were grouped in packs as the train car could load at two ends. So with my group, once the train arrived, commuters began to gather and allow one another to board by stepping up and climbing the stairs into the car. When it came for me to board, I looked to my right and there was a women in her early 30s that I nodded to to allow her to board before me--that's when I was astonished on what happened next. The women made a big scene over me stopping to allow her to board in front of me! She scolded me with, "You're only doing this because I'm a woman." This was stated in a yelling, pissed off voice. I was speechless.

The officer to my left was a Navy Admiral. I looked over at him, and he, rolled his eyes. So, I simply turned and boarded the train in front of this irate woman. She could have simply said, "no thanks, go ahead." I wouldn't have thought anything of it then.

My attempted act of being courteous was shoved back into my face. The woman, no lady in my opinion, dressed in civilian attire, disrespected me in front of 15 or more commuters for being an officer and a gentleman. This behavior stuck in my craw that day and made an indelible mark in my mind.

When I got to the office and told several of my fellow officers on what happened, they too, could not believe this women's overt and contemptuous behavior.

I have long thought about this incident and have rethought my speechless response to her comment. The best I could come up with is " No, I though you were a lady." However, that snide remark would not have been appropriate based on my own personal standards. That, would be grossly out of character for me to do.

This was, perhaps, the beginning of women gaining a foothold into serving in the military in combat roles, at least aboard naval ships and to a lesser degree as foot soldiers.

The rise of the smart phone also has, in my opinion, allowed younger people to lose personal contact with others--you know, one to one contact--that has caused the erosion of manners and old fashioned, traditional courtesies, like "please and thank you, and of course "you're welcome." And, by all means, don't hold a door for anyone.

Perhaps my retort to those that reply to a "thank you" with "no problem" should be a snide, "yeah, right." But then again, I may be the last person in the restaurant to get my meal on time and one that doesn't look like the bottom of a shoe.

As for me, I will continue to be courteous. It's natural for me because my parents taught me to be respectful and courteous to others. I'm attempting to teach the same values to my grand kids. Maybe that will help a tiny, tiny, tiny bit.

"Dedicated to keeping the classic Pontiac engine alive."

----
400 bored +.030, forged TRW pistons, ported 62 heads, Hedman headers, 2.5 SS dual exhaust X Pypes, Comp 276AH10 cam, Scorpion 1.65 RR, 850 Q-jet, stock intake & tuned HEI; original owner.
Go to Top of Page

Bentwings
Two Feathers

USA
31 Posts

Posted - 11 Jan 2018 :  10:36:24 AM  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I see this all the time at our apartment. Being nice and courteous only makes me an odd ball. That?s fine with me. It?s why I much prefer to dine with my streetrod buddies. All are very nice. The restraints we go to have pro help and address each of us by name. Unbelievable. One or two servers maybe but five different places....nice. You should see the tip piles they get and the Christmas gifts.

I must be a ? presence? as my kids may call me by my first name but I get first clas treatment when they are around. It even transfers to ofther adults at the shop or where ever we are.

Byron
Go to Top of Page
  Previous Topic Topic Next Topic  
 New Topic  Reply to Topic
 Printer Friendly
Jump To:
Pontiac Street Performance © 2006-2017 Go To Top Of Page
This page was generated in 0.11 seconds. This Site Sponsored By:
Powered By: Snitz Forums 2000 Version 3.4.05